"If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent" (essextee) 04/01/2019 at 09:17 • Filed to: None

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When an automaker says something is a lifetime part they really just mean "it'll last until the warranty ends and after that fuck you lol"

ItalianJobR53 - now with added 'MERICA and unreliability > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/01/2019 at 09:21

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They also make that component stupidly hard to replace most of the times...

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > ItalianJobR53 - now with added 'MERICA and unreliability 04/01/2019 at 09:24

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i.e. my CCV that the book says you have to pull the intake manifold to reach.

LOREM IPSUM > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/01/2019 at 09:30

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The one on the back of the mani, facing the firewall, and held in place with something like 8 torx bolts? That one?

Been thurr. Good times. 

facw > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/01/2019 at 09:31

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As I near 100,000 miles, I probably should get the “lifetime” transmission fluid in my Volvo changed. I’m a bit worried about stirring up whatever dirt/debris might be in there though, the transmission does give me some reasons to worry about its health, and I’d rather not shock it over the edge.

Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/01/2019 at 09:47

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for the lifetime of the part

ateamfan42 > Dr. Zoidberg - RIP Oppo 04/01/2019 at 09:53

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Guaranteed to work, right up until the moment it doesn’t.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/01/2019 at 09:56

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“Lubed for life” as a late 90s marketing term can go fuck itself. Even if there’s some reason to believe the part will last longer if it doesn’t have points of weakness at the zerks/wherever, if the car is then designed around those parts not being accessible to grease or replace...

If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent > LOREM IPSUM 04/01/2019 at 10:03

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No, the one that’s behind the mani, the throttle body, a large section of wiring harness, and has rigid tubes coming off of it that snake and contort all  through the engine

LOREM IPSUM > If only EssExTee could be so grossly incandescent 04/01/2019 at 10:05

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Sounds like a blast! The engineers must have been dorm-mates.